Bizarrospam

I just received this most amazing piece of spam in my work email inbox, not five minutes ago.

"Right now I need the sugar.
A dead cat with a cute name.
It seemed deliciously funny.
It was the gotta, wasnt it?
For the last time, he hoped.
Now Paul could see his eyes.
Ralph Dugan from Anne Dugan.
Ralph Dugan from Anne Dugan.
""Just three times, I swear.
"She shrugged, then laughed.
He would have some of those.
She put it in his numb hand.
Youve been working so hard.
He would have some of those.
Just one week and one bitch.
The pattern was inescapable.
"I dont know what you mean.
She put it in his numb hand.
It was the gotta, wasnt it?
"But would you want to stay?
Blood pattered on the floor.
"Right now I need the sugar.
At least strongly suspected.
For the last time, he hoped.
"I gotta know will she live.
He thought he would be okay.
She looks at the old people.

There was an attachment, but I'm certainly not daft enough to try opening it. Of course, the fact that I use a mac at work means that it was probably formatted for viewing on a pc. What a shame.

But even so, it's remarkable. I have absolutely no idea what it's trying to sell me. There's no mention of herbal viagra or penis enlargements or even an offer to put me in touch with single women in my area (for the last time, I really don't need any more of them cramping my style, OK?)

Sent by a 'Raymond Scott', which was a bit of a let down. Such a normal name, for such a weird email. Of course, if it had come from Rodolfo Thong (one of my all time favourite spam-names) I wouldn't even have raised an eyebrow.